When the Storm is a Storm

Yesterday morning I posted a short post called "Winds of Change", which you can find here. Yesterday I talked about when we seem to be experiencing the billowing, gusting, bending, wind of the Holy Spirit and mistake it for a storm instead of the Lord doing a changing work in our life.

Today, however, I want to talk about when the storm is a storm. There are storms in all of our lives. Storms that rock us, seemingly drowned us, swallow us, and block out the beauty, hope, and joy that the Light gives.

I have experienced a few such storm, some of my own doing and some that I have experienced due to what others have done. I have felt the pull beneath the surface to just give up, I have often forget the beauty and life of the Light, and I have cursed and yelled, blamed and resented in the midst of my storms. However, just because the storm is a storm doesn't mean that I am there alone. When my bones are weary, my eyes are wet, and my soul is done, the Hope holds onto me. When I have let go of the Hope, the Promise, the Truth...He has never let go of me. He has preserved me, led me, carried me, and sustained me. He has made every provision for me in the midst of the storm, as He does for all of those who place their hope in the great LIGHT OF HOPE.

You see, just as a storm came upon Noah and his family, God spoke to Him long before the storm was to come. He prepared Noah, gave him specific instruction and set him to task. When I think of Noah and the Ark, like many, I fast forward to the end, to the rainbow and dry ground, the offering and the new beginning, I skip the middle or at very least skim over it and most of the beginning of his story. I skip the part where it tells of how God preserved Noah in an Ark, provided for him, promised him, and delivered Him. I'm sure Noah's storm was wrought with stench, sea sickness, hunger, weariness, loneliness, hopelessness, worry, anxiety, irritation with his family, and the list could go on. My storms are not so different, they to are wrought with many of the same things, and like Noah, the Lord Almighty, has preserved me in an Ark. He has preserved me in His grace and mercy, in His presence, as HIS. Now I don't know what your Ark may be, but I promise that if you look where you yourself stand and not at the wind and waves that are about you, you will find yourself in the arms of a Loving Father who has placed your feet on the Rock.

Hebrews 10:23
"Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for he who promised is faithful."

Isaiah 43:1-3a

But now, this is what the Lord says—

    he who created you, Jacob,    he who formed you, Israel:
“Do not fear, for I have redeemed you;    I have summoned you by name; you are mine. When you pass through the waters,    I will be with you;
and when you pass through the rivers,    they will not sweep over you.When you walk through the fire,    you will not be burned;    the flames will not set you ablaze. 
For I am the Lord your God,    the Holy One of Israel, your Savior;

Winds of Change

Last night I sat in my bedroom cleaning out a box with miscellaneous stuff in it. While cleaning and tossing and putting away all the little odds and ends that had found there place in this box I came across a piece of paper with some thoughts I had jotted down about this time last year and I wanted to share them here.


I sit here in a car rider line having just scrambled for a pen. It's as I sit here, waiting to pick up Big Sister from a day camp, the winds begin to pick up and an ominous cloud moves overhead. The winds are billowing down on the nearby crepe myrtle trees, the basketball goals in the parking lot are rattling against the gusts, and as I sit here I begin to ponder the similarity of the bowing wind to that of the Holy Spirit in my life at times.

I pray for a fresh wind of the Holy Spirit in my life...a refreshing, cleansing, life giving breath of the Holy Spirit. However, when those winds are stronger and pushing against my stubbornness, bowing me over, I have this tendency to view it as a storm and not the Lord answering my cry for healing and life through the cleansing life giving wind and rain.  

As I sit here, these crepe myrtles are being shaken about and blossoms are being loosed into the wind. How many times in my own life do I stand staunch, resistant to the wind, not allowing anything to be loosed from my heart, clinging desperately to what is mine and often times being forced into a position of surrender and submission. So the questions this morning is this is the storm a storm or the Lord answering our cries with winds of change and adding life giving rain?

Purity for the Modern Woman: Part 1 Lift Up Your Eyes

So in today's culture "Modern" is such a broad and loosely used word. So, let me start off with defining what I mean by "Modern". Modern Woman, as it is discussed here is a woman living in today's culture and society, whether young or old, single or married, mom or career woman. A woman living in the here and now in this modern day and age.

Now with that out of the way... 

It was last week I found myself thinking about this idea of Purity. I had just received an email from a friend asking me to speak with a group of young ladies attending a True Love Waits Conference, at the church I grew up in, about Purity. Unfortunately, due to a scheduling conflict I won't be able to, but it started me thinking. Thinking about that little piece of paper I signed when I was in youth group, about the key necklace I wore and gave to my husband the day that I got married, and what purity means for me today. 

What does Purity mean for me, not as a wife and mom, but what does purity look like for me...for my soul. Well, let me tell you what purity is not. Purity is not abstaining, purity is not avoidance, purity is not trying to do better and be better. It can't be those things. If I want to be pure, truly, really, "without" as Webster's defines it, I can't do it, not on any level. It's false, humanistic, and driven by my own abilities. 

Purity:

a) lack of dirty or harmful substances

b) lack of guilt or evil thoughts

It must go beyond me, because me, is a sinner, broken, weak, distracted, and human. 

Just as Eve in the garden, we want what we want, to reach outside of God's plan and purpose for our lives, even if just a little, thinking no one will ever know. We want what is outside of the design. 

So Purity...HOW?!?!?! 

Let's now replace the word purity with the word HOLY: TO BE ALTOGETHER SEPARATE. If I want to be pure, my purpose and focus must be on that of HOLY. My mind dwells on a million different things thoughout the day and not often on HOLY. Most of the time it is making it from bed, to breakfast, to school, to lunch, to nap time, chores, dinner, kid's bedtime, and then to the quiet. Where does the HOLY fit into that? What does fit into that is anxiety, stress, exhaustion, frustration, short temperateness, and anger. My mind focused on what is before my feet and not what is above me. When our eyes are focused on what is down we will only see what is down, and will be gut-wrenchingly faced with our inability to accomplish all that lies before us. However, we must as the psalmist says is Psalm 121, lift our eyes upward...that is where our help comes from. 

Lifting our eyes is hard, it's scary, it takes effort, takes surrender, and sadly it's usually only done when we have nothing left, no other plan, when we have tried it all, to no avail. At some point we forgot that to which we were born again to. You see in 1 Peter 1 it says we are born to a living hope, through the RESURRECTION OF JESUS CHRIST. Y'all for a minute think about that, set aside the innumerable times you have heard about HIS resurrection and just think about that. HE DIED and WAS RESURRECTED!!! He declared death and Satan a liar and a LOSER!!! Because of this we have hope, but not just that... it's a LIVING HOPE. Alive, never ceasing, unending, always, and forever. If He, Jesus, was brought back to life, then we to are given this, allowed this same LIFE, through His great mercy to experience the same. LIFE. I all to often live like the walking dead. In this LIVING HOPE I am granted the boldness and courage it takes to look up to HIM, to meet His EYES. To be beheld and to BEHOLD. Oh to be as Isaiah in Isaiah 6, completely undone before the Lord, purified before HIM, Healed, Whole, and desiring of only HIM, in a world that wants nothing to do with HIM at all. 

It's no surprise that we have every shade of off white, grey, black, and every other manner of that which is not HOLY thrown at us, flashed before us, dangled in front of us. However, when our eyes are set fully only on HIM nothing...I MEAN NOTHING will suffice, nothing will even compare to the glory that is beheld in HIS eyes. YOU will/can be enveloped in the one who has chosen you, ransomed you, healed you, freed you, and bestowed all that HE has on you. Whether your faith is strong or weak? Whether you find yourself full of hope or hope is all but lost? LOOK UP!!!

2 Corinthians 3:7-18 (The Message)

Lifting the Veil

7-8 The Government of Death, its constitution chiseled on stone tablets, had a dazzling inaugural. Moses’ face as he delivered the tablets was so bright that day (even though it would fade soon enough) that the people of Israel could no more look right at him than stare into the sun. How much more dazzling, then, the Government of Living Spirit?

9-11 If the Government of Condemnation was impressive, how about this Government of Affirmation? Bright as that old government was, it would look downright dull alongside this new one. If that makeshift arrangement impressed us, how much more this brightly shining government installed for eternity?

12-15 With that kind of hope to excite us, nothing holds us back. Unlike Moses, we have nothing to hide. Everything is out in the open with us. He wore a veil so the children of Israel wouldn’t notice that the glory was fading away—and they didn’t notice. They didn’t notice it then and they don’t notice it now, don’t notice that there’s nothing left behind that veil. Even today when the proclamations of that old, bankrupt government are read out, they can’t see through it. Only Christ can get rid of the veil so they can see for themselves that there’s nothing there.

16-18 Whenever, though, they turn to face God as Moses did, God removes the veil and there they are—face-to-face! They suddenly recognize that God is a living, personal presence, not a piece of chiseled stone. And when God is personally present, a living Spirit, that old, constricting legislation is recognized as obsolete. We’re free of it! All of us! Nothing between us and God, our faces shining with the brightness of his face. And so we are transfigured much like the Messiah, our lives gradually becoming brighter and more beautiful as God enters our lives and we become like him.

A Night in Silent Wait

A Night in Silent Wait

By

Cherish Michelle Hamilton

For Grandmother

Tonight we sit in silent wait

For a Baby that ‘twas born to save.

A Savior born in manger lay

Emmanuel is His Name.

Redemption come for all to know

The LOVE of ABBA that ‘twas long foretold.

A Baby born in lowly state

In which the hope of all men lay.

His name is Jesus, Messiah, Redeemer, God

Who gave up everything to be with us, know us, save us, and dwell in us.

A Baby born to suffer and to die

Sent to Redeem both you and I.

So as we sit in silent wait for this Baby that ‘twas sent to save

You must decide this very night what you’ll do with this Baby sent to die.

His sacrifice was for your very life

So the question ‘tis this, what will you do with His gift.

Will you receive the gift He gave and sit in silent wait to know Him everyday. 

Have we missed the call?

Today I found myself in Luke 10. I’m not really sure how I got there, but none the less that is where I found myself. It is here in Luke 10 I found a verse that I’ve heard a million times, but this time it was different…this time I paid attention…this time I saw.

You see for far too long I have perched my spiritual rear end on a tidy little verse in Luke 10. A verse that is deep and inspiring. A verse that calls, cast vision, and gives a command. It’s a verse that has been a hiding place for me for many years, a place where I can feel good, as well as safe.  

Luke 10:2 “And He said to them, ‘The harvest is plentiful, but the laborers are few. Therefore pray earnestly to the Lord of the harvest to send out laborers into his harvest.”

Like many of you it’s a verse we hear constantly in the church, and something we faithfully pray for. Laborers…other people to rise up and go into the fields while we sit in our tidy little homes in our tidy little community busy keeping things tidy. I missed it…completely MISSED IT!!!! I don’t know how…well sure I do. I like things the way I like things and it’s difficult to do anything that would change the way the things I like are done.

So, some of you may be wondering what in the WORLD I am talking about. Well. STOP and GO READ LUKE 10:1-12.

Okay, hoping that you really did go read it. If not GO READ IT!!!

Okay, I’ll stop being bossy, but seriously it is good stuff. The point is, for me, somehow I’ve only ever focused on verse 2. I’ve somehow come to believe that only praying for laborers, others that would go, is good enough. What I failed to understand is that this passage is a commissioning of a group to go before Jesus into cities that He would visit, to proclaim the gospel. In this commissioning He is instructing them to pray for CO-LABORERS. Okay, let’s just stop for a second. This is what I missed and I think many others might have missed as well. I have prayed for years for laborers to go into the “fields” believing with my whole self that the harvest is ready, but what I have failed to acknowledge is that I am to be praying for co-laborers, meaning that my rear end should be out there and not abiding in my tidy little space of a place.

Wake up…there are unreached people groups here in the boundaries of our city and abroad, there are broken and hurting, widowed and orphaned, lost and dying EVERYWHERE, but yet I/we just wander in the wilderness of our tidy spaces in our tidy community praying for someone else to rise up and go. I feel like I’ve been duped, distracted, bewildered, and utterly self-serving, all while a harvest awaits the good news of the gospel. You know …that Good News story we’ve heard over and over, know backward and forward. Yep, that’s the one about His Life, Love, Death, and Resurrection to Forgive, Heal, Restore, and Redeem all things. The one that for far too long has sat looking so nice and tidy on my nice and tidy little shelf, where I can put all things that I like to reference when it serves or suits me best.Y'all I'm tired of tidy and ready for REVIVAL.

PAUSE for just a moment. I know that I might be perceived as a little harsh or just ever so slightly exuberant …I’m okay with that. You see the reason is that I finally got my eyes checked and my vision was so totally impaired. I have been blinded by everyday distractions and pursuits and I’ve been struck so squarely between my two eyes. You see I was blind to a world just outside my door that is in need. Those who are lonely and longing, those who are desperate and hurting, those who may not look like I do or believe like I do or have anything in common with me, but you need to see, that you have what they need.  JESUS.

Those 72 had the responsibility and great privilege of going before the Savior of the world to proclaim his coming, vs. 9 “The kingdom of God has come near to you”, and so the same falls to you and I. The Kingdom of God is near and we are to go and proclaim this before His second coming. However, let us take GREAT note of how He sent these 72, vs 3-4 “I am sending you out as lambs in the midst of wolves. Carry no moneybag, no knapsack, no sandals, and greet no one on the road.” He is not sending them out as lions ready to pounce on whatever lies before them, but He sends them as lambs with NOTHING. Often times I feel the need to be prepared to defend myself and what I believe, and instead of going in humility and meekness, as that of a Lamb, I go with a defensive spirit and argumentative nature, with my Biblical arsenal of theological terminology and all manner of spiritual prowess . UGH!!! It makes me ill to think about how I have offended not only others but grieved the Holy Spirit with my arrogance and spiritual haughtiness. Let every word that proceeds out of my mouth be that of a Lamb, with blessings of Peace, that will lay the ground that the Holy Spirit will allow the gospel to traverse.

Let us pray and ask the Lord to give us vision to see beyond our tidy space of a place, that He would break us of every preconceived notion of the where, what, and how to do this going thing? That we would be hindered in no way to enter into every place that is in need of the proclamation of His Peace, Life, Love, and Forgiveness, and that EVERY word that proceeds out of our mouth would be tempered with grace, humility, and love. Let us be co-laborers together preparing the ground with peace and love that the Holy Spirit will use to bring the GOSPEL to the world. LET US GO!!!

Oh Weary Momma

Yesterday I had the privilege of sharing a brief phone conversation with one of my lifelong friends, Michelle. She is an amazing mother of 4, ages 7-2. She is superwoman… homeschool mom, housewife, lover of Jesus, and brilliantly talented artist. Yesterday, she had called to tell me happy birthday and as we chatted we joked about being in our 30’s as if we were becoming old ladies before our time. In the midst of our jest I paused and stated I’m glad I’m getting older. You see, there is something beautiful about getting older. In my “old” age I now have a chance to speak about being younger. For Michelle and I and many other of my friends, this is something we value so much. We realize the importance of having someone who has walked before us, been the tired, exhausted mom of the newborn and toddler trying to keep it all together and do it all alone. We, now, being “older” and wiser realize the importance and life giving capability words have in seasons of weariness and exhaustion. 

So to the tired mommas out there…know that you are not alone. I have been the weary mom, with the messy house, dirty laundry that flows from every corner, dusty bunnies teasing me in every crevice, desperate and exhausted. The weight of guilt over not engaging your children enough, to the mess that seems to be everywhere, to the fact that you may or may not have taken a shower in the last 5 days, to the fact that chicken nuggets and mac and cheese may be on the menu 3 times in a week…YOU ARE NOT ALONE!!! Breathe…then BREATHE again…NOW ONE MORE TIME. There is no perfect answer or schedule on how to keep a clean house or on top of the laundry. Let go of the condemnation that wears you down and keeps you there. Let go of the fear that your friends will be totally disgusted by your mess. Stop feeling guilty over how bad a mom you might be and delight in the fact that you have amazing kids, maybe a little dirty or sticky, but amazing. Stop trying to do it all at once, and just do what you can in a moment. Put down the facebook or iphone and look around. Look into your children’s eyes and see the wonder and imagination that is there. That little amazing person is yours, whether biologically or adopted, you labored, prayed, and have believed God for them in unimaginable ways. Rejoice in the gift that you have. A mess will keep and facebook will always be there as far back as you want to go, but dear momma just breathe and see the beauty that is before you. Relinquish the lies of the enemy who so desires to keep you blinded and distracted from the beauty and opportunity that is right before you. There is no formula or perfect procedure to being you, but don’t let weariness, distraction, and guilt keep you from doing what God has gifted you the right to do. Just breathe and then Breathe again. The mess will keep but memories wait for no man. 

Romans 8:1 "There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus"

A Year in Review

As I sit here waiting for the water to boil for my afternoon cup of tea my mind begins to think about all that has occurred this past year. It was this time last year I sat in a very lonely place. We’d experienced a mountain of change and transition in a very short amount of time.  Our family had grown, my husband changed jobs, we started homeschooling, started attending a new church, and the list goes on. I sat in this place of change and transition tired and energized all at the same time. You see, I knew God was up to something. He moved so many pieces and shifted so many things that I knew He was on the move, preparing the way for us, and preparing us for the journey. The mountain of change that we faced required a lot of faith. It required me and my husband to be a unified front, being on the same page, line, and letter. We tried to “pray” our way out of some decisions and God wouldn’t budge.  He said move and so we did. The familiar comforts and places were so hard to step away from, but we knew we didn’t want to miss God, His calling and will for us. So we obeyed.

The changes that we faced of course came with their own set of hurt and heartache, and were certainly accompanied by their own set of losses. However, we knew, without a doubt, that we were doing what God had called us to do. We were tired of the same circular race that we had been running for years. We had a hunger for God and knew that He was about to show us Himself in new ways and do new things in us. We were ready to get to work.

However, for me, I had a particularly difficult time trying to discern what God’s will for ME was in this season of life. What did He want me to be doing? I knew He was calling me, first to Himself, to seek Him and know Him, and second to make Him known. I also knew that He has blessed me beyond measure with two amazing little girls who I have the privilege of staying home with and homeschooling. Was that all He wanted from me? If so, then awesome. I consider it my greatest joy and privilege to be a mom. I wasn’t ever sure if it was possible to do more and take on more in this season.  You see I was like a small girl in front of an enormous dam with her finger in this tiny hole, holding back an unfathomable flood of the Holy Spirit, just because I didn’t think it was “my time”. The more I stood in this place of uncertainty the more I knew that no matter what my circumstances were, God’s provision would always be Faithful, and that His calling was for RIGHT NOW.  There would be no more days sitting disheartened wanting to be doing more,  no more days filled with anxiety over my inability to be about anything other than the privilege of caring for my home and family. He made us, me and you, to do things far greater than our mind would ever conceive as possible.

So what did I do??? I began to seek God, get into His Word, Pray and Fast. No more sitting on the sidelines waiting for anything to fall in my lap. I sought out to be discipled by a Godly Woman. I needed someone who would challenge me, encourage me, and teach me to do hard things and do them scared. I needed someone who exemplified what it looked like to love Jesus and follow His call no matter the cost. I needed someone who was real and authentic and reveled in the unending grace of our Father. I needed someone who would pour into me and wanted me to experience all that God has for me, and that is exactly what I got. I cannot even begin to express how thankful I am for this past year, the encouragement, challenges, friendship, prayers, and tears that have been invested.  Through being discipled and invested in, God has become more precious and dear to me than He ever was in the past 33 years that I have been in church. My affection for Him is often more than I can bear. I have experienced a REVIVAL, a new season of growth and life is taking place in my life. I have had to step out in Faith and believe God for words to share with my International friends. I’ve had to pray and believe God for a move of the miraculous in my family and the families of my friends. I have had to believe God that I am BELOVED and chosen by Him “FOR SUCH A TIME AS THIS”. I have had to face some ugly truths about how I was living and the lies I had come to believe as truth. I’ve had to step out in BLIND faith and do some hard things and do them scared, BUT, without fail God in His great mercy and faithfulness has met me every step of the way. He was and is there every step of the journey.

Being a disciple is no easy thing. It’s a full on pursuit of Jesus, His Holiness, Love, and a life of surrender. A life lived in longing and pursuit to be Like Him and For Him. It’s a call to get your finger out of the dam and allow the Holy Spirit to invade and do with you what He will. Life is not perfect or easy. My husband and I still fight and my kids drive me crazy, my words fall short all the time, and I royally screw up a lot, but God meets me with such grace in every moment and in every step. He has Redeemed me, Restored me, and made me whole. He has Revived my soul and He calls me His own.

Dedicated to the women who have journeyed with me these past 33 years and taught me what it is to Love the Father and Follow Jesus.